Dear Stretchy Pink Toy Company Inc,
I’m writing about the Stretch Minaj™ doll that we gave our Becky for her third birthday last Saturday. Within two minutes, the arms popped off, and the legs remained in their stretched-out state.
Stretch Minaj™ suddenly looked as shocked as Becky, and her expression frightened our daughter so much that she ran out of the house screaming. We haven’t seen her since. I’d just like to thank you for this wonderful product, as we were thinking of putting Becky up for adoption anyway.
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